So, I'm a little behind on List v.4/09. March came in and went out like a lion in this house, so my thinking processes have been just a bit skewed.
Depression came back in full swing as the month progressed. Lots of extraneous bullshite came about. See Take the Meds, Please for the brief, but gory details. Hence, I just have not had a great deal of time to focus on self improvement matters. As I look outside, at the ever greener grass, I am reminded of all the stuff I've put off and really need to get going on. Better late than never, I do suppose. SO, here are the plans for the remainder of April.
Health/Appearance
GUESS WHAT?!?! I finally went to the eye doctor...yesterday. So, shiny new frisbee-sized contact lenses should be arriving tomorrow or Friday. YAY. Also, went to the regular doc for the depression. Put me on yet ANOTHER med, so we'll try and see how this one works. Gotta get more blood work done, to check on bile/bilirubin levels and thyroid, due to a tremendous all over internal ITCH that has overwhelmed me lately. Not sure if it's stress related or a side effect of being sans gall bladder. Doc said that bile levels, when they get too high (I think), can cause itching. Great. Checking thyroid because appetite has been OUT OF CONTROL this past month, while energy levels have been next to ZERO! I WISH it could be as simple as a thyroid problem. I do. I'd love to say that I'm going to diet like hell this month, but we'll wait and see if the meds help with the appetite first. Getting back on water consumption again....kind slid over the past month....and didn't accomplish the giving up of the Diet soda either.
So for April, let's see what I can do:
-Get a hair cut? Maybe.
-Lose 5 lbs.
I'll keep it simple. Baby steps, you know.
Relationships
March was a true test of my abilities to withstand and perservere when it came to family. Lots of issues with my daughter. Felt really, just absolutely disconnected from my husband, and I still miss my son horrendously, even though he was home for Spring Break. Can't wait for summer break!! I know I've probably been in denial about the whole depression issue, and thus my own issues contribute to the downfall of other relationships, so we'll give it a month and see if I'm back up to par, emotionally. If so, I guess it's safe to say that I can only get better living through chemicals. For the record, the defiant, independant part of me despises the fact that I have to take anything. I hate being weak. I hate it, I hate it, I HATE IT!
In April, let's do this:
-Reconnecting with my husband. On all kinds of levels.
-Continuing to work on issues with my daughter. Court appointed counseling (for her) begins in last week of April. Trying to communicate better and more with her, but it does take two, so she's going to have to work at it just as hard as I am. We've both pulled away. Time to pull back together.
Career
Oy. Work/finding work/doing work went right down the toilet in March, so now it's time to get back on track. If not for the support and faith of my very good friend Yo , creator and founder of Freelance Writerville, I don't know if I would have the faith and courage to keep going with the writing. I watch her, I read her, I follow what she does, and I try to learn how to make this thing successful. Time it will take. Much time.
April's Do It To It List:
-Journal. I need to journal. I need to start getting my emotions and feelings OUT of my head so I can get past them.
-Demand Studios: Keep plugging away at those articles. My all time high was 11 approved for one week. Not bad, but I can do better.
-Write more for Textbroker. It's good practice if nothing else.
-Write one or two original pieces for Constant Content.
Self Improvement
Guess what else took a trunkside seat in March? That's right. Who has time to work on themselves when they are busy worrying about everything else? Part of repairing my destroyed self is creating new habits where money is concerned. If you want to know more about how to be a financial screw up, you should read The Debt Killer Diaries. It's a sink or swim effort to get myself up and out of this very deep hole and get myself and my family back on track. Apart from that, it's SPRING. Time for cleaning, gardening and sorting things out to sell.
April brings:
-Getting flowerbeds raked out, giving Peonies and Irises a chance to survive.
-Getting garden set up. This one's kind of hard on my own, but it looks like there's not going to be much else I can do but do it alone.
-Sorting through, listing and selling books on Amazon. Look for more later, if you want some cheap reads.
That, I do believe, just about does it for April. It's a smaller, less ambitious list, so hopefully, I can overcome and succeed at accomplishing the majority of it. We shall see.
Feel free to share your own 2009 progress. It's good to compare notes!
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2 comments:
Wow Miragi, you have so much going on personally I can see and understand how you're feeling. I hope you have a good month. Me personally, I work 70 hours per week and have very little time to do anything. My one and really only goal is to complete my writing projects, which has been incredibly difficult as with such little time, I have no energy when all is said and done. I don't have monthly goals, just long term ones, but basically I live breath to breath...ahhhhh there's another breath hahaha!
My blogging schedule is as little as possible, but I try to write a few posts per month. I'm over it, but will keep my blog just in case I ever get the itch or when I have extra time (and that is scarcely unlikely).
I wish your daughter a mental revelation and hope she makes the best choices in life. I was a very bad kid who almost ended up in prison, but I turned out OK:)
Sorry your work schedule is so overloaded, Bobby :( Don't give up on that writing though, one day it WILL get you where you want to go!!
Thanks for the understanding.
I feel powerless, most of the time, to make her see or realize anything. I think probably because we're so much alike, we can't relate at all. Sad.
I'm gonna try to have a much better month!! XO
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